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 Angel Babies
The Compassionate Friends offers siblings a place to tell their story. Through smiles and through tears the bonds of friendships are formed. Here is a place where every feeling is validated. Every memory is meaningful. Others care deeply and are willing to listen with an open heart. Hugs are given and received freely!


The Compassionate Friends, Pittsburgh Chapter is proud to dedicate a section in our website, exclusively to talk about our "Angel Babies".

The pain of losing an infant is filled with all the hopes and dreams of what never came to be. We have few photos; we have no memories; we have nothing but an intense longing for a child that we loved from the moment we found we were expecting. I think people think it may be easier to lose a baby, because we have no memories. They think we couldn't have bonded, having never met our child face to face. Of course, it is the worst lost to lose our children at any age. However, it is actually that lack of memories that makes the loss so difficult and confusing. The grief lingers on through the remainder of our lives, for the hole that is left in the family is very real. Years ago, women weren't even permitted to grieve such a loss. They were told to pick up and move on and forget it. I thought of how many people actually just pretended the baby never existed. I wrote this poem, "Can I Pretend" , in response to those thoughts.

Written by Tammy Tobac,
Courtesy: TCF Pittsburgh PA

Give sorrow words.
The grief that does not speak whispers the o'er-fraught heart,
and bids it break.
    - William Shakespeare


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